so i failed my C Maths 1 and FNDB.
so?
but i passed FNDB on supp paper.
but i failed C Maths 1 on supp paper.

BLOODY HELL...................

i knew it!!darn i had that goddamn feeling.

i spent the whole day watching tv.absolutely nothing to do.anyways,i got a pre-camp on 3rd May all the way to 6th May.i thought of going for the arts thing on 6th with someone.but damn...i shall think of a way out.

*thinking.....*

nothing on HBO,nothing on Nickelodeon,nothing on Cartoon Network,nothing on Disney Channel,nothing on Playhouse Disney,nothing on Discovery Channel,nothing on National Geographic Channel.maybe i'll watch MTV.

i seriously can't believe how i failed my Computing Maths 1 module.Its really bugging me all day and would bug me throughout FOC to the next sem.

::: tellmeareasonworthfightingfor :::

usually,i blog in the late night.but i guess today i'll write off in very early morning.

let me get straight to the story.yesterday i went to sentosa's siloso beach.with my 2e4 classmates.it was ridiculously hilarious..and fun too....it turned out to be an all-gay club outing.hahahahahaa.....~

me,lemuel,ben,hadi,zhi hui and his twin brother zhi da,vincent and later christopher.the rest,all MIA.it was bloody frustrating at first because most in fact many of them simply can't be bothered to come.but hey,we still had fun.

swim,play ball,swim,play ball,swim,play ball.once vincent kicked the ball into a foreign lady.IN THE HEAD and while she was taking a picture.imagine what the picture will turn out to be.maybe the ball above her head.vincent and his sharpshooting skills.hahah.

then when the day was growing older,we headed off to harbourfront centre and ate at the macdonalds there.sitting there talking about the good ol' times while eating.then headed back to tampines thereafter.went to play pool.went home at around 1am.

today,i stayed home all day as i had a flu.supposed to go out with my TP classmates to buy stuff for chalet.now at 90% recovered.9% still tiredness.1% sunburnt.it friggin' hurts when i bath with hot water.and my face is feeling heaty all the time.

i love you so much.

yosh!!....long time never update.

friggin' supplementary papers been killing me.oh well.you gain some,you lose some i suppose.i've been watching Xenosaga the animation,Kakyuusei 2,Bleach,Gundam SEED Destiny.
Xenosaga has an impressive storyline.Kakyuusei 2 was more on the emotional side;really touching storyline.Bleach was impeccable.Gundam SEED Destiny was excellent.

now downloading GunBuster 2.

i think for the past few entries you people might begin to think that i have no life.the truth is;i had a life.maybe tomorrow i shall change the song.i said maybe.Gundam SEED Destiny song.

baka-yaro!!

ienai itami,kanashimi de kizutsuita kimi yo
kesenai koto mo seoiattekou
ikiru koto nagedasanaide!

tsumaida,kimi no te o
itsuka ushinatte shimau no ka na?
usurete yuku egao to kimi o mamoritai kara

hibiku boku o yobu koe sae kare
tokesou kaze ni kikasaretatte
kimi o mitsukedasu!

ienai itami,kanashimi de kizutsuita kimi mo
waraeni nante,hito kirai nante kotoba sou iwanaide

mienai mirai ni okoru koto subete ni imi ga aru kara
ima wa sono mama de ii,kitto kizukeru toki ga kuru darou

You and Me,two are spoken.
itsuka wakariaeru kara
-------------------------------------------------
(Opening Theme for Bleach episode 26, D-technolife by UVERworld)
-------------------------------------------------
Translation in English:

You've been hurt by unspeakable pain and sadness
Let's carry each other's indelible stains
Don't give up on living!

I held your hand
Will I end up losing them someday?
I want to protect you and your fading smile,so...

Even if the resounding voice calling me should wither...
Even if the mingling winds should tell me...
I will find you!

You've been hurt by unspeakable pain and sadness,but...
Don't say things like "I can't laugh" or "I hate people"

There's a meaning on everything that happens in the unseen future,
So stay as you are for now, I know there'll come a time when you realize it

You and Me,two are spoken
Someday we'll understand each other.
----------------------------------------
nice song.maybe 1 of these days i'll upload this song into my bloggie.as always,its dedicated to someone.and this song is dedicated to syaf.heheh.well,you always sound gloomy even though outside you're happy right.?i know.you must cheer up okay?heeeheee.

well,last night i had a marathon again.i slept at around 7am.and guess what.i was rudely awakened by my handphone.it was my small sister,and i really blasted her for that.damn.
after that i can't sleep no more.

did you know?Gundam SEED Destiny episode 25 and Bleach episode is released today.

Destiny was fine.Bleach was impressive.as always.

it seems i have run out on my ideals.well,i got to rest.damn i can't have marathon.i'm leaving my laptop and desktop running.i'm downloading some anime.

well,see you guys around.

i love you so much.tell me why i love you so much.

it is now confirmed.i'm now sleeping beyond 12am.for almost everyday.hey a lot of good documentaries are on tv.for example,The Body Snatchers on Discovery channel,CSI:New York on AXN,Megastructures on National Geographic channel,Spongebob Squarepants on Nickelodeon?hahah.

so well anyway,there i was sitting in front of the tv the whole day while having my laptop on the coffee table in front of the tv as well.using my wireless network to connect to the internet.damn fine day if you ask me until................

my stomach growls.

yep.it needs food.let me tell ya'll something.when my stomach ain't feeling good,i don't feel good.

(*) (*)
(.o . o.)
(") (")
((") ("))

eh look.i created a rather fat bunny.oh well.i got to study for supp paper anyway.that pieced of cursed printed paper.now now,let's not get carried away.

i really haven't been doing my tie & dye lately.not much.hahah.guess how much of sewing i did.only the centre part and it ain't lookin' too good.gotta' do some revision first.
guess what i got for the exams.

JMP 2 - C
FCSOS - C
FNDB - F
C MATHS 1 - F
HuH&D - C+
LDRSHP - C+

hahah.ok.what i think is that they're a bit screwed up.that is some serious shit.i've been slacking my life off.but with new found inspiration i shall continue to persevere.i will become 1 of the greatest.i promised myself some A's for next semester.from what i think,its not a matter of having shit for brains,its all about the courage and the persistence to face up to the task.the result?

persistence + courage = an asshole with the brains of einstein with the guts of hitler

you know,some people are just born to piss people off.

in my opinion,politics are bullshit.what is democracy?what are meritocracy?what are capitalism?hah.i better not comment on anything.before the ISD bust my ass off.

i think.i'm going to get myself a girlfriend.

another one?no.the same one.hahah.just joking.no.i was joking about getting another one.someone may get jealous.ok,but back off,she's mine.eyes off or i'll rip your guts off.she's beautiful ain't she.

friggin' air-con.it leaked.now i have to sleep on fan power.urgh.its a shame.you know,i've always thought that this world was filled with technological greatness.but to think my air-con started to 'piss' in my room.that's beyond words.if you get what i mean.

well.i guess that's that. guess i'll be having a mid-early morning bath.

i love you.mmmwwwwwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!~

Life Goes On
Mamoritakute
Kokoro wa kudakarete
Hontou no kanashimi wo shitta hitomi wa ai ni afurete

namida de ni jinda kono sora wo miageru tabi
hakanai aosaga mune wo shimetsuketeku
sadame nara kanashimi no hate made tatakai tsuzuketa hibi wo ato ni
Life Goes On
Moeagaru
inochi ga aru kagiri
Shin jitsu no jibun sae miushinai sou sore demo
Life Goes On
Mamoritakute
Kokoro wa kudakarete
Hontou no kanashimi wo shitta hitomi wa ai ni afurete

----------------------------------------
(Ending Theme for Gundam SEED Destiny Episode 23,Life Goes On by Mira Arisaka)
----------------------------------------
Translation:

Life Goes On
I wanted to protect it
But your heart was shattered
And those eyes which know true sorrow were filled with love

Every time I look up at this sky stained with tears
Its empty blueness squeezes my heart
If its my destiny to leave behind the days when I fought till the limits of my sorrow
Life Goes On
I flare up
As long as i still have my life
Even if I almost lose sight of my true self
Life Goes On
I wanted to protect it
But your heart was shattered
And those eyes which know true sorrow were filled with love
---------------------------------------

well anyway the first part was a piano solo.too nice to be called nice.its impressive.
i didn't have enough sleep.because you know why?i stayed up all night sewing and well...chatting with syaf.at around 5am,my eyes were like 'HEY MAN!!!I NEED SOME SHUT EYE!!!'.
so i slept!!!told syaf to wake me up at 6.30am but instead i slept through to 7am.bugger.hahahahahahhahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.a few days ago my eyes were already suffering from 2 non-sleeping days.now i feel so.....energetic.because you know why?i'm ready to blast someone off.someone who was suppose to wake me up!!!hahahah.no la.just joking.

ok.I'M JUST JOKING!!.bluekz.now i really need some sleep.maybe i shall update later.

oh by the way,did i tell you Gundam SEED Destiny anime ROCKS!!!~

hey don't touch Lacus!!!she's mine.and so is Lunamaria Hawke!!!hands off.buggers.

hey whadda fuck?i just highlighted my recent update and it was gone!!!!damn bloody this blogspot editor.bloody fuck.i typed so long.*trying to recall what i typed.assured that its 90% accurate.*

a couple of things before i start.i slept at 4.30am just now.hahah.i had a couple of interesting dreams that are just worth the while typing.

firstly,i was giving an international performance playing a violin on a grand stage in front of a live audience.i didn't knew i could play the violin so well.heheh.

second dream, i was married to this blonde caucasian girl with blonde hair;and surprisingly GOLD coloured eyes.her complexion was extremely flawless.doe eyes*except for gold coloured*;stunningly beautiful.i can never forget that face.

it was......unimaginable.ok so like we're sleeping in this room in this house.out of nowhere these group of armed people with guns stormed in and i fought with them.both me and the girl escaped using these anti-gravity platforms!!!!cool eh.really it was kinda interesting.Laugh Out Loud.

third dream i didn't remember as well.all i remembered was i blasted through this hall with a broomstick and whacking the shit out of a reporter.the next thing i knew,the reporter went live 'propaganda-ing' my FULL name and told the news that i whacked the bloody cahonas out of her.hahah.

wait.the last dream i faintly remember.it was something about driving a car.but i forgot about it nonetheless because i was instantly awakened by a phonecall.whaddaya expect the bloody phone is just beside my ear.

what ever happened to anime addiction?
i just downloaded Kokyuusei 2 and Pretty Cure.

i'm tired of chasing girls.i'm just tired.now let them chase me instead.this is really unnecessary.

i'm going out.

don't look at me when i'm like this.

ever wondered why we forget stuff?well i did.Anyways,for the last 2 nights;i had sleepless nights.It's what doctors and 'para ahli kesihatan' call;insomnia.but the thing is;its not insomnia.its anime addiction.

today.what did i do today.basically went out for breakfast with Lemuel.Walked past East Spring and i purposely dropped at the adjacent bus stop and walked to 201.Saw nisa,huda and err...some malay dude friend whom i don't know his name.i ate 2 egg 'pratas' and left abruptly at 8am;and i purposely walked home.just to think about some brewing matters in my mind.long walk it may seem.sigh.

so i've been thinking,does your health level and the length you stay alive during combat;depend on a person's rank?does being a General prevent you from dying if you were shot by a sniper whose rank is only sergeant?think about it.

i went to East Spring Sec sports day.it was despicably horrendous that had disaster spelt all over everyone's faces.what a shame.honestly.

compare with the Rome empire.Jupiter house = Rome.ok? now what happened to Rome was;it had a change in leadership and over 'ambitious-ness' of its people.correct history-freaks?
now apply it to Jupiter house's case.and we get Jupiter meets Rome.the East Spring way.

hahah.what a bore.and now i failed Computing Mathematics 1 and Fundamentals in Database Systems.got F's.yea so i slacked.big deal.i just lacked concentration.i trust myself.in this world i trust only myself.its all because of...................

no point pointing fingers.damn.what would you do if you were in my place?blaming others is the only way?we'd be no better than others.

i did all i could,now its up to you.i'm truly sorry.

Bleach is a nice anime.

oh by the way,did i tell you my birthday is on 14th November?

learn through mistakes.i've made a lot.1 of them was falling in love.

i was alone when i secretly told you that;i love you.

--End::

a continuation of previous post....

second post for the day.just finished bathing now awaiting helfi and irfan to come over again.
last 2 nights;i dreamt that a meteor was going to hit Earth.and the TV announced that it was the end of all mankind.i was like friggin' scared.
last night i dreamt i was talking to 1 of my juniors in East Spring Sec.just as the conversation went on,suddenly i don't know what got over me and i hugged her.CRAP!!!

recently i've been reading some books on the functions of the human mind.it states a certain trick to remember your dreams.it friggin works;at least for me for now.i've been into a lot of activities lately.Learn japanese language while juggling the intricacies of Mandarin without professional help. My schedule from next week onwards would be alternating going to the gym,swimming,tie and dye,learning language day and lastly playing games and chatting. and football training. *although i don't chat very often,coz nobody wants to talk to me.*

oh by the way,my highest score for Spider Solitaire is 1900 in 110 moves.hahah.beat that.
best scores for minesweeper:
-Beginner (7 seconds)
-Intermediate (38 seconds)
-Expert (95 seconds)

anyway,results for semester exam are out this Saturday.make it or break it.oh and and,there's no such thing as luck.

why are you doing this to me?

recently i've been eyeing some desktop computer upgrade.upgrade hard disk drive,DVD-ROM,CPU,RAM,graphics card,sound card + speaker.its about the same cost of building a brand new modded desktop machine.

for now,maybe i'll upgrade my laptop's RAM coz its been friggin' laggy.damn.

hakana ku chitta hikari ga
bokura wo ima yobisamasu
kanashimawa oto wo tate
kieru ano basho kara

fukaku ai suru
yuuki to kibou tsuyoku
kanjiru kono kioku ga
karamiau kokoro to kokoro wo tsunaide ugokidashiteru

kagayaku hikari ga terashi
bokura wo ima yobiokosu
hibikiau oto wo tate
kizamu kono basho kara
towa ni shinjitsuzukete

(Opening theme song for Gundam SEED Destiny Phase 13 onwards by High & Mighty Color,Pride)

this song is singing in my head.sigh.been missing sumone so badly.well,thats the reason why i had been starting to do tie and dye.to keep my mind off things.well......thats all i can do.

irfan and helfi came over my house today,to do tie and dye.it was super interesting.at least im not spending the day in solitude within the confines of my room and the company of my laptop and desktop computer.i'll be continuing the craft tomorrow too.well,mine is a small one.keeps things simple enough.it turned out to be a square.too bewildered to describe.me and my misery.bought a 1 metre cloth for $2.99 .bought the dyes,the string for $9.80 .ok.shit.

i'm beginning to think that having a girlfriend or finding 1 for that matter;is somewhat an obstacle.well...for 1 reason....its bugging me from my studies.argh.whatever.now is not the time for relationships i suppose.now i'm not worrying about a relationship.now i'm friggin' worrying like fuck if i'm going to retake a whole friggin' semester!!!!

goddammit.i hate myself.really.

anyways,my phone is getting silent this week.no smses.no calls.might as well turn it off and i myself go into hibernation.whaddeheck.who cares anyway,i have less bill to pay,save money.
someone unimportant like me.its ironic anyway.only when people have trouble then approach me.if not,not a single word from them.what am i?customer service?or helpdesk?argh.whatever.
nobody cares anyway.is it because i'm too forgiving?or is it because the world is so banged up that nobody else would help them.i wonder.

sometimes i feel as though i fare better off being alone.no worries,no troubles.foolish you might say.or selfish.but do not ever think i cannot achieve.my intelligence is definitely far more superior than most people.

i'm really missing her.help?

in all my years,i've never asked for a bigger favour.

destroy my dreams,but never destroy my heart for it contains the love that i have saved for you through the years.for always.